The Power of Community with Michelle Huljev

michelle huljev Feb 08, 2023
 

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: You are heavily into helping build community right now, and you actually harnessed your community, the people around you even way back then to get their perspectives to kind of get their kind of thoughts.

And so really, I mean, you are solidly immersed in the belief around the value of community. 

Michelle Huljev: Yeah, community has always been a big, important piece of my life in so many different ways. I mean, as I said, I spent 17 years in the financial industry and I was really, I mean, I think community goes way back for me, but I worked with a team that was an incredible team between two companies and they were real, we were like family.

Between those two companies and then my community from my colleagues and my neighborhood and just everything has been such a really important piece to me. And I live in a small town in the middle of the busy Bay area, San Francisco Bay area. And it's like community is a central piece.

So that's always been something I've looked for. It's a very connected small town. So that's always been something that has been highly important to me. Feeling connected and like knowing our neighbors, continuing that connection with my friends from college and high school and all of that, and making sure that, we look out for each other and we take care of each other.

, that's been a big important piece for me always. 

Faisal Ensaun: Yeah. I love that. And it feels aligned with me as well because I didn't grow up in a nuclear family. Just even going back to my childhood. Even though we were in a sort of nuclear household, we were always around aunts and uncles, cousins, and like I remember when I was like anywhere between three and a half years old, all the way to

when I was 13 years old, we were in this apartment complex, but my uncle was in front of me. My aunt was there, and we all like went to each other's place. Like it's as if it was the same place, like, as kids we knew that this was our home to sleep, but we spent more time there and my friend's place was there.

And so it was interesting because it gave us a sense of security for one thing and it was a different land, but it wasn't our hometown home country. But also it gave us a sense of, okay, there are all these people looking out for us and helping us and gave my parents a sense of, okay, it's not just them looking out for us, but it's just at the basic foundational level.

It makes a huge, difference. I loved what you said about that nudge. I think every coach I've talked to, they, they, they've had that nudge to some degree To kind of jump into this thing. I'm curious to hear though, after all these years of you being around coaches and doing coaching, what speaks to your heart about coaching?

 What is it about it? what do you, in retrospect when you're looking back, like what do you think about coaching that now that you're in it, maybe it's not as random as Dr. Sheri mentioned, like how do you feel about the whole process? 

 What is it about coaching that connects to your heart?

Michelle Huljev: I've always loved people and I just love hearing people's helping people and hearing their stories and helping to guide them to see different possibilities for themselves. I think that's the piece. I mean, I particularly love one-on-one coaching. That's where what really I'm really passionate about.

I just love having this connection and seeing that there sometimes people don't see for themselves. I mean, I think all of us, we can kind of have blinders on, so to speak, and, and not see all that's out there or helping people to see different perspectives on things. I think that's really the piece of it and that connects for me also.

It's that connection, the connection between the coach and the client. I know being a client of a coach, before I became a coach, it was like, oh, somebody is here for me, cheering me on, and somebody is, you know, helping to guide me to what's my next best self. And I think that's the piece there, that connection and really being able to support people in their process.

You know, have a better life and feel more positive about themselves. We all go through ups and downs and especially in the past few years, and it's helping people to see like, okay, you may be in a tough time, but there's hope out there, there's positive we can find a positive direction and helping them create their own answers.

I think that's the piece that I really love too. As a coach, I don't have my clients' answers. They have their answers, but sometimes it's hard to see those answers. So like that connection piece, I think having a connection with someone who can help you find your own answers and give you that space, I think it's also about creating that space too.

Faisal Ensaun: Yeah, I love that. Our listeners are coaches. I think we need to understand how this connects to all of us because I think a lot of what you said connects to me is like, I love the connection piece.

I, even though, a lot of what I do is group coaching nowadays, I still have my handful of one-on-one clients that I really feel connected to, and many of them have been with them for three years. Two plus years at least. And it's just incredible to think about that. It's like, oh, how We've gone through a journey, a lot of them out.

Well, let's connect it back to community. So you've spent quite a bit of time, at least the past few years as far as we know, like building up the community of coaches that we are part of and we felt connected to that, to the certified coach high-performance coaching community. That's part of it.

And what would you say, like maybe we can start with, first of all, why is it important to create a community, an online community of people to come together? And what is, what is the significance of it in our path as coaches? And we'll start with that and we'll talk about what it takes to sustain that community.

So what is it about community that we need to go into? And then we'll talk about what it takes to move that forward and who to talk to about this. And then Michelle has helped us kind of stay connected even. Pandemic with the high-performance coaches and it was so great to see you in person this past year too, and then actually get to hug each other.

Michelle Huljev: I know it was great to reconnect in person, with the community high-performance coach community. As far as community, I think it's super important whether you're doing group coaching and creating a community in that sense, or creating a community, like joining a community of coaches or whatever the profession is.

Because just like I was saying earlier, the connection with my, clients and coaching, I think as coaches, we need that connection for ourselves to continue to improve and learn from each other and to not feel alone in the journey. I think that's a really important piece whether it is you, you're new as a coach or an experienced coach, and I think this is true for like whatever profession, this can be across the board, but specifically speaking about coaches Because if you're navigating, building your business or even if you're within a corporation and doing this, there's so much to still learn.

And I know within the community, the high-performance coach community, there are people from so many different backgrounds that bring so many different experiences into the community. And it's just, I think creating that space to continue those conversations of learning is really important. And to feel like.

There's a space to reach out when? When you don't know where to go or you don't know what to do, or you don't know what the next step is or how to get there, or you wanna practice with somebody. I think creating a community is a really important space, and I think that it's, that connection piece really is a grounding piece.

I'm not sure if that really answered the question, but I mean, for me, it's the connection. The connection is huge. And I know for myself, when I have community, I feel like there's so much more that's possible. It's almost like a built-in group of coaches you know, a built-in coach kinda leading the way with that meaning, Or, or a community of coaches where you can reach out and say, Hey, I need a helping hand here.

Or, I don't know how to do this, or Will you practice a session with me? Or, how do I set up my business this way? I think it's just, an incredible resource to have a community. And then there's the emotional piece of it too, that connection piece, which I think as we've learned, and we think we've always known this, but I think it's just been so highlighted in the past few years of how we all need that for that emotional support is huge too.

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: Probably put a little context around this Faisal, I think I totally forgot to share with our listener. They're listening to us and they're like, what community? What community? What she, so Michelle, you are basically the point person to coordinate and put boundaries around and maintain the certified high-performance coaching community.

which is a certification under Brendan Burchard, and there are over 1200 coaches who are certified who kind of fall under this umbrella that you're trying to help connect and build community with. And, and you've been doing this for how many years? 

Michelle Huljev: Since 2015. 

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: Okay. What's that like? Eight years? 

Faisal Ensaun: That, that was a year. I got Certified. That's when you started. 

Michelle Huljev: That's when I started as. Community and program director, and I was certified as a coach the year before that in 2014. Cool. Cool. As a C H P C. 

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: I was gonna say there's, so I just wanted to make sure that our listeners understood, like you're, you've been managing a lot and you've got a team under you to kind of help the community run.

And I think there are two ways that we can take this conversation and that we are taking the conversation. There is a way for me, as a coach, How am I in community to grow myself? And then there's gonna be a lot of listeners who are like, I'm trying to grow a community that I can manage and lead and help other people grow.

So I think there's, the application goes in two different directions. So I just kind of wanted to clarify that because I think both are really important in the life, of a coach and the journey of 

Michelle Huljev:

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: coach . . 

Michelle Huljev: Absolutely. Yeah. Having that, having that support system as a coach, a support system of other coaches, a community of other coaches, and then creating that for your own coaching clients, creating a community, whether it's a community for your group coaching clients and they're all going through the coaching together as a cohort or evergreen or however it's set up. I know people have various ways of setting up their group coaching or it's a way you bring your one-on-one coaching clients together in a space where they can share and connect. And I think one thing that is really powerful in both cases, it's that continuing to have the conversation and those growth conversations that happen.

Outside of a coaching session or a coach training. But, it's creating a safe space and an environment for that continued learning and continued support where, I mean, this, my perspective is, And I think it, it depends on each person, how you're setting up your community, but having an intention of how you want your community.

What's the intention of your community? So for the communities, I've done group coaching and had a community for my own group coaching as well. So I've seen both sides of, of community and, and running community and setting that up. I think one piece that is really important is to be clear on what's the intention and how is it gonna be run.

Meaning in both cases I have my role is to kind of stand back and hold the space and create that space and have the boundaries set up around it. But I don't always initiate everything in it because it's a space where the community members create those connections and ask those questions. And it's more holding the space and creating boundaries within boundaries and guidelines, which I think are really important either, in either situation.

For community. So I think those are really important pieces, but allowing the community to ask questions of each other, share with each other, and really keep that conversation going. 

Faisal Ensaun: Yeah, I love that. And there are a few other things you said even before this, which I thought were really brilliant because one of the things, especially with coaches, and like we're talking to coaches as well here, is as you go on this journey, one of the first feelings that appear is the feeling of like, you feel alone.

Because it's one thing to, like, if we're going to those events when we're, whenever we go to our certification event, we're around everybody. We're excited, we're dancing, and we're hugging each other. We come home, we're all excited to start this week. The first week you're excited. By the second week, like, oh shoot, I don't know what I'm doing here.

who do I reach out to? Who do I connect with? Then I think, One of the most powerful things that I've seen, and it kind of goes back to Sheri's point around like there are two sides to this, is like, how do we conduct ourselves within a community? And then how do we run a community cuz they're both sides of it or there?

I love what you said, Michelle that creating that space and setting up guidelines around it is important. So for me, as I've been on both sides of it, and one thing I've learned in the certified high-performance community is consistently posting stuff and I'm engaged, but often in the background, I learned after the first two years of kind of being there, cuz I was in my own little corner and I was just trying to figure things out and getting frustrated. At some point I remember I was like, okay, that's not working.

Why don't I just start talking to more coaches? And that actually helped me a lot. and part of it that was, that became sort of the birth of C M C as well, but also even just being engaged within the certified high-performance coaching community, where I started reaching out to more coaches, talking to them, and I learned so much just interacting with them.

And then later on as I kind of moved forward, I, I became a little bit more active. I'm like, okay, anybody needs help. I can help you. It's, it's like, reach out cuz I knew like how hesitant I was to reach out to people. And that's, I think what makes that community powerful, just as from the perspective of being part of something is to be helpful, to be there to support each other and not feel like you're alone.

 I think, makes a huge difference. And a lot of the times, especially, in the coaching world, I think one of the things that are understated is that that feeling of loneliness goes on. And the main thing that I've learned how to deal with it, I'm in conversation with coaches constantly. Probably three times, four times a week probably more if I were to really look at my calendar, it would 

Michelle Huljev: be, it would be more, it would be more, it's 

Dr. Sheri Fluellen: just three to four times a week just with me and some of our, I know our colleagues, 

Faisal Ensaun: But that has helped me stay with that 

there are very few people that understand what we're doing unless they're on that path. You, when you're around them, you get so excited. You're like, okay, you're trying this thing, I'm doing this thing too, and I'm struggling with it, but I'm trying to figure it out. Just being part of that struggle together makes it so much easier.

Yeah, and every coach that I've talked to, it's been the same things like, oh, I don't know what I'm doing. And a lot of it, they think that it's a solution they can't come up with, but a lot of it is those in that emotional. Of like, I feel alone, that's not a good feeling for human beings. I mean, we figured that up during the pandemic.

We figured that out. 

Michelle Huljev: Definitely, yeah, definitely having a community to reach out to and not, and be able to feel connected with. And as you said, like in between times when you know, there may be a coach training or in-person piece. But keeping that momentum going. I know that. When I first became a coach, I reached out to the beta coaching was a big piece. I know that for me and just making sure I was connecting with members of the community to practice and have those conversations. Otherwise, I felt like I was staring at my computer not knowing what was next and just floating. 

 

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